Monday, April 5, 2010

Couldn't hit the broad side of

Once upon a time, many moons, many many moons, many many many...(enough with the moons) ago, any film I was working on that I was shooting, I would sing this song at the start of the shoot....

Don't ask me why. Maybe it was the only TV show theme I knew all the words to.

Little did I know at the time, how life would imitate art..very bad art.

As one of my many tasks I set out for myself when I started this insane endeavor, I had to move my shed.


Stunning, isn't?

My favorite part is the rust! :) So earthy!

So anyway, last Saturday, I took the #@*$ing thing apart.

Like a shed of cards, huh?

So the much more Significant Other and I, trotted over to Home Desperate to pick out spray paint.

SO: We should get all the paint now.

Me: I don't know. I think we should wait. (was getting a bad and expensive feeling)

SO: Really? Why not? This way you don't have to come all the way back here.

Me: Let's hold off.

At times, I get ideas that form in my head, but can't exactly verbalize them at the moment. I call these my caveman thoughts.

If there was a thought bubble over my head, it would read something like this, "Me think this bad. Me not know why. Me not buy. Me explain later. Me need bronto-burger."

So, we do buy a can of red, a can of white and a can of primer, to test the colors.

This is what one can of black primer covered...


The thought, "not a whole h*ll of a lot" comes to mind. Plus I was battling the wind and probably lost a good 3rd of a can to gusts.

So now with my new information, my inner caveman can now have a conversation with the inner bean counter part of me.

Caveman me: this not cover cr*p

Bean counter me: right you are, my hairy friend. In fact, it doesn't cover much at all.

Caveman me: how many bones it cost?

Bean counter taps away on giant adding machine. Rips off receipt and hands it over to Caveman me.

Caveman me: F THIS!

Bean counter me: Not very economical is it?

Caveman me: me hungry.

So after figuring out the square footage, the amount of cans I will need, I found the result would be waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay expensive. Disheartened, I broke the news to my SO. She pondered for a moment and then said, "is there another way or different kind of paint?"

I had one of those coming to the mount moments. "duh, why did I not think of that myself, duh?" Daftly, I responded with, "I will check".

Lo and behold! Behr paint makes a paint and primer. So a can of "Bleached Linen" and a can of "Gerianium" later, I'm all ready to go.

(I want to give my SO a special thanks for cutting through pea soup of my brain. That was the "fog" part of my brain).

Cost of each 1 gallon can of paint: $36.95 plus tax. A gigantic cost savings. Let me say that again, A GIGANTIC COST SAVINGS. :)

So Sunday, I start paining...


And painting...


And painting...


Now that I had this stuff started, I had to move the old shed base. After unscrewing the wood floor, much to my delight, I found that the center section contained concrete. Weee...

Two weeks before, I had prepped the new area. More or less leveled it. (I knew once I moved the base into the spot, I would have to level it again.).

So I grabbed an end and pulled...and pulled...and pulled...


There it is on the right. The brown bald spot is were it used to be.

So it's now Saturday, my SO is working, however, she will have tomorrow (Sunday) off. I thought, well, when I took those walls down last week, it was pretty windy. Thus making the deconstruction a colossal exercise in patience. Trying to keep the pieces straight and not bending in the wind, proved to be quite the challenge. I'm thinking, "I will need SO's help if I'm going to get this done. I'll have to wait till Sunday".

But this being Saturday and Sunday being a WHOLE day away, I get the"itch to finish". SO is working and I need her help. And besides, I have a lot of other work to do. However, I'm just looking at the now painted walls and roof scattered around my yard and they beckon to me. build me...Build Me..BUILD ME. Ugh, I couldn't take it!! There was virtually no wind to speak of, so I thought, "what the h*ll".

Screw, screw, bolt, bolt, lose balance, smash toe, cut leg, swear a lot; I finally got it all together.

Come Sunday, with the help of my SO, we put in the last few bolts. I now give you...


Not to shabby, if I say so myself.

With some elbow grease, a bit of swearing, 70 bucks of paint, and a burning desire to get that #$%*ing done, it's finished.

I toasted it with a nice Gin & Tonic. :)

With that behind me, I will next be putting up new clotheslines right next to my little red shed. A little "T-Bar" number, which I will also blog about, much to my total of 2 1/2 readers delight.

But before then, as I mentioned in the previous post, I will be making mozzarella cheese. That should prove to be very amusing.

And as a little new feature, I will be posting bi-weekly picts of one of my beets plants growing! Wow...what a thrill...I don't know if I can contain my anticipation...please, more mind numbing photos of plants growing...

HEY! At least it isn't real time video! "Hey kids, tired of watching paint dry? Watch my plants instead! Oooo, watch them sway in the wind!"

When last we left our little friend the Beet, he was about 1/2 tall, now hold onto your hats!!


It's a whole 1 1/2 inches!!!! Oh the humanity!!

Fine. Whatever.

I will leave you with this last pick.

Remember, Green is Good!!!



G. Deborah Dupre' said...

Glad to be a FB connect. Your photography is as good as your writing - both interesting and uplifting. BTW -
Had a squirrel sneak in my house today...Trade ya: Please come see my writings at

Anonymous said...

Low VOC paint I hope. HHFY

typehype said...

Entertaining post, as always. The new red shed is so attractive! I laughed out loud when I saw it whole and then flat and in pieces. EEEE squirrel!

Kimber said...

I love it! Funny how I can actually hear your conversation with Con and your grumbling and swearing. I just wish I was there as I would have been loving that project. How far did you move it???? Feet? Yards? Whatever it was, nice job. That is one smart lady you got there - other paint... what would you do without her? XOXO

Kimber said...

Also, we found a place to hang our bird feeders so we could see the birds and avoid only feeding the squirrels - under the overhang (soffett?) of the roof. They are right outside the kitchen window and the squirrels haven't been able to get to them. Don't worry, the trees in our yard provide enough nuts for all the squirrels in the northern hemisphere. They won't starve here. :-)